A blog post by Adriana Bachmann
You've toured the hospital. You've packed the bag. You've downloaded the contraction timer app and watched more birth videos than you care to admit.
And yet, nothing quite prepares you for the reality of those first hours. Not just the birth itself — but everything that happens around it. The decisions being made on your behalf. The interventions you didn't know were optional. The moments that pass in a blur while you're exhausted, overwhelmed, and completely in love with this tiny person who just arrived.
I've spent over twenty years working with newborns, and I can tell you this with certainty: what happens in the hospital matters more than most parents realize. Not just during delivery — but before and after, too.
In Bitches, I've Arrived, Chapter Two is dedicated entirely to the hospital experience — what to expect, what to ask, and what to advocate for. Here's a preview of why it matters so much.
Hospitals Are Not in the Business of Explaining Themselves
Let's be honest about something. Delivery wards are busy places. The staff are experienced, they're moving fast, and they're working from a standardized protocol. That's not a criticism — it's just the reality of how hospitals function.
The problem is that standardized care doesn't always mean optimal care for your specific baby. Decisions get made quickly, procedures happen in sequence, and parents often don't find out what occurred until after the fact — if at all.
Some of those decisions carry consequences that show up weeks, months, or even years later. I'm not saying this to frighten you. I'm saying it because awareness is your most powerful tool in that room. You have the right to ask questions. You have the right to understand what is being done and why. And there are specific things you should be asking about before your baby takes their first breath.
I cover all of them in the book. Every single one.
Your Birth Plan Should Include Things You Haven't Thought Of Yet
Most birth plans focus on pain management preferences and who's allowed in the room. That's a good start. But there are decisions that begin almost immediately after birth — some within the first minutes — that most parents haven't considered and nobody brings up until it's already happening.
There are standard interventions given to newborns in American hospitals that are not standard in other countries. Some of them deserve more scrutiny than they typically get. Some of them may be entirely unnecessary depending on your specific situation and health history.
I share my honest opinion on these interventions in Chapter Two, including what the research actually shows, what my own experience has been across three births in two different countries, and what questions you should be walking into that hospital ready to ask.
This isn't about being difficult or anti-medicine. It's about being informed. There's a significant difference.
There's a Simple Practice That Can Benefit Your Baby for Life — and Most Doctors Won't Mention It
One of the most impactful things you can do for your baby in those first minutes costs nothing, requires no equipment, and is backed by solid research. It simply requires that you ask for it in advance — because if you don't, it won't happen.
I'm talking about something that happens (or doesn't happen) with the umbilical cord. Standard hospital practice in the United States handles this one way. The research suggests there's a better way. And the difference between the two could genuinely affect your baby's development, iron levels, and long-term health.
I go into this in detail in the book — including how long to wait, why it matters, and exactly how to bring it up with your doctor before you're in the middle of labor.
What to Watch For the Moment Your Baby Arrives
After delivery, most new parents are focused on one thing: that their baby is healthy and here. Understandably so. But there are a few specific things to check for in those first hours that are easy to miss — and significantly harder to correct the longer they go unnoticed.
Two of the most commonly overlooked conditions affect how your baby feeds. They're present from birth, they're correctable with a quick procedure, and yet they slip through the cracks constantly — even in good hospitals, even with attentive nurses, even with lactation consultants in the room.
If these go undetected, feeding becomes a struggle. And if feeding is a struggle, everything else becomes harder: weight gain, sleep, your own mental health. The ripple effects are real.
There's also something to watch for in your baby's head shape that has a short correction window. Most parents don't know this window exists until it's already closing.
Chapter Two tells you exactly what to look for, what questions to ask, and when to push back if you feel like something isn't being addressed.
The Feeding Advice You'll Hear at the Hospital — and Why I Disagree
You're going to hear something in that hospital that sounds reasonable, comes from a credible source, and is, in my opinion, one of the most common causes of feeding problems in newborns.
It's a piece of advice that gets repeated constantly, treated as fact, and rarely questioned. And the parents who follow it without question often find themselves struggling with a baby who isn't gaining weight the way they should — and have no idea why.
I'm not going to give it away here, because the full explanation matters. Understanding why it's wrong — and what to do instead — is what makes the difference. That's in the book.
What I will say is this: my babies gain two pounds of healthy weight per month. They feed well. They sleep well. They grow faster and are more alert than average. That doesn't happen by accident. It happens because of how they're fed from the very beginning — starting in those first hours at the hospital.
You Are More Capable Than That Hospital Room Makes You Feel
There's something uniquely vulnerable about being in a delivery ward. You're in a clinical setting, surrounded by experts, at one of the most physically and emotionally intense moments of your life. It's easy to defer to everyone around you and assume they know best.
Sometimes they do. But sometimes, the best thing you can do for your baby is to slow down, ask one more question, and trust your own instincts enough to advocate for what feels right.
The most empowered parents I've worked with didn't walk into the hospital knowing everything. They walked in prepared. They had questions ready. They had a plan — not just for the birth, but for what came after.
That's what Chapter Two of Bitches, I've Arrived is designed to give you. Not fear. Not a fight with your medical team. Just the information you need to walk in with confidence, ask the right questions at the right moment, and make decisions you'll feel good about long after you've left those hospital walls behind.
Medical note: This article is for general educational purposes and is not a substitute for individualized medical advice. Discuss your birth plan, newborn procedures, feeding concerns, and any proposed treatment with qualified healthcare professionals who know your medical history.
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